"One major mistake is reacting instead of observing what's happening. We need to practice what I call 'tactical listening.'" - Klaus Lassert
Advanced psychological knowledge is essential for leading difficult negotiations because it helps you understand and influence both your own and your counterpart's emotions and behaviors. Mastery of these principles enables you to manage pressure, anticipate responses, and craft more effective strategies.
Anna Cajot had an engaging conversation with Dr Klaus Lassert, Doctor of Psychology, international corporate consultant who specializes in using cutting-edge psychological methods to tackle tough negotiations, conflict management, and leadership challenges. Klaus, who has coached global managers at INSEAD Business School in Paris, brings a wealth of expertise to the table.
Anna: Thank you for joining me, Klaus. Can you elaborate on what the field of advanced psychology of negotiation encompasses, and why is understanding psychology so crucial for successful negotiations?
Klaus: There's no other place where psychology translates so immediately into cash as it does at the negotiation table. How you handle your emotions translates into millions, how you read the room translates into millions, how you press your counterpart's buttons, and how you choose your words translates into millions.
Psychology is the study of human emotions, thoughts, and behavior. It's the behavior that directly impacts your results, but it’s the underlying thoughts and feelings that drive that behavior.
If you've mastered the basics, the next step is to gain insight and control over these two deeper levels-your thinking and your emotions. When you do, you’ll have the edge over your counterpart.
Anna: What do you think are some of the key psychological principles that can influence the outcome of a negotiation?
Klaus: I approach this from two perspectives. First, how much insight do you have into your own dynamics? Ideally, you should have as much as possible. Second, how well do you understand your counterpart's dynamics?
We can break this down further: people consciously make decisions and apply tactics to influence the other side. However, there’s also a deeper level where people behave tactically without realizing it, often unaware of the unconscious goals they're pursuing. The key here is insight and awareness.
Even if you know all the right strategies, your negotiation partners likely do too. Everyone’s read the SCHRANNER CONCEPT, everyone knows Chris Voss. So, the real question is, who performs better under pressure? Who can execute what they know, and who can subtly influence their opponent to lead them in the desired direction?
Anna: Based on your experience, what are the most common psychological mistakes people tend to make during negotiations?
Klaus: One major mistake is reacting instead of observing what's happening. We need to practice what I call "tactical listening." When your counterpart speaks or acts, focus on observing and analyzing their behavior in real time. This allows you to make a deliberate, autonomous decision on how to proceed, rather than reacting impulsively.
When you let the other side trigger your emotions, you lose focus on your objectives. Suddenly, an emotional need, often only partially recognized, becomes the priority. You might invest energy in proving a point or convincing the other side of your logic, simply because you can’t stand the idea of them not agreeing with you.
Another issue is that people bring their emotional needs to the negotiation, such as the desire to be treated kindly or to have everything go according to their plan. But in reality, that’s unlikely to happen. When those emotional needs aren’t met, people tend to lose their edge in the negotiation.
Anna: If I'm aware of my emotional triggers, is it possible to eliminate them entirely, or is it more about recognizing and managing them effectively?
Klaus: It’s about managing them. One of the fields I specialize in is "active tactical resilience." The first step is analyzing your triggers, and then preparing yourself so that when those external triggers occur, you have better control of your internal and external response.
However, there’s no one-size-fits-all solution for managing triggers. It involves a comprehensive technique of preparation and analysis, tailored to both general situations and specific moments. It’s a continuous process, akin to maturation. Just as a toddler learns to manage their emotions, we work on reducing the frequency and intensity of emotional deviations. This is part of the tactical resilience training I’ll also cover in the conference. Over time, this training helps minimize overreaction and improve overall effectiveness.
Another key aspect is understanding what’s happening emotionally on the other side. I teach two important rules here. The first is obligatory: cover your flanks. Don’t let anyone manipulate your mind, including your counterpart. The second rule is optional: play with your counterpart. This means shifting from being afraid of their emotional outbursts to seeing their emotions as a tool you can influence and use. This way, you turn moments of insecurity into moments of dominance.
Anna: Could you share a specific example or case study where advanced psychological techniques made a significant difference in the outcome of a negotiation?
Klaus: Absolutely, there are many examples, and I’ll delve into some of them in more detail at the conference.
The common pattern involves double-checking a spontaneous reaction, whether it’s sending a message, making a demand, offering a concession, or avoiding confrontation. By applying the analysis and tactical planning tools I provide, we often find that a different approach is more effective. This might mean choosing an alternative strategy, timing, or even deciding not to respond immediately and waiting to see what unfolds.
For example, if someone is about to make a significant concession out of the fear that this was the only way to save the relationship, I might persuade them to hold off. They could then find that the relationship improves without the concession, saving them significant resources.
Many times, we can quantify the difference between the potential outcome and the actual result due to the psychological techniques we apply. It’s interesting to see how often this approach leads to substantial improvements.
Anna: For those who won’t be attending the conference, what immediate strategies can they start using right away?
Klaus: I would recommend starting with self-observation. Look at the moments when, under pressure, you do something different than what you intended. What exactly happened in that moment, and what was going on in your mind?
That’s the starting point. Once you recognize what’s happening internally, you can begin to align your actions with your intentions. This is useful not only at the negotiation table but in life in general. If you're interested in learning more, check out my content or attend the N-Conference where I will be leading the 90-min breakout session on the “Advanced Psychology of Negotiations.”
Register for the Conference here: https://www.n-conference.com/conference/zurich